The Fear of Success

We've all heard the phase "afraid to fail" but how often do you hear "afraid of success"?

We are all familiar with the phrase "afraid to fail." We grow up believing that if we fail bad things will happen and moreover, that we are failures. What if I told you that you are actually afraid of success?

Humans have been conditioned to seek out comfort. Typically this "comfort" is a form a avoidance. Avoiding our thoughts, feelings, or a situation that makes us uncomfortable. When we are stressed we gravitate towards comfort foods. When we don't want to face reality we seek ways to escape.

Humans naturally resist change. Change adds a level of uncertainty and work to our lives. We evaluate any given change based upon our past experiences and determine if it is necessary/worth our investment of time, energy, or mental fortitude. With so much to consider it becomes easier to just be content with what is.

This same thought pattern can be applied to our success. It can be daunting to think about what success means to us in our careers, relationships, or life in general and we enter into a cycle (content, not content, avoidance, and back to content). When we take the time to reflect on what it would take to change it, we become overwhelmed and avoid the thoughts or feelings that we have.

This happens to everyone no matter how successful you are. But what if I told you that it is not failure that you are afraid of, but success? Don't believe me? Keep reading...

Let's say you have a job (content/comfort). The next day you feel frustrated because you don't have the money for the new "toy" that you want (not content). So you do research about how to advance your career. After hours of research you are frustrated because it makes no sense or you don't have the time it would take to invest. So you close your laptop and push the thought from your head (avoidance). You are exactly where you started (content). Until the cycle starts again. If you fail, nothing changes. You are exactly where you started.

But if you succeed, everything changes. You may have a new schedule, a different career, a new place to live. You will be forced to adapt to the new you and that can be terrifying!

What I've learned is that change happens slowly and you need to set small, realistic, and attainable goals in order to have success with the larger ones. Making small adjustments to something you are already doing every day, can help to forge a path toward major life changes.

Working with a life coach can help you to keep things in perspective while simultaneously providing you the support you need to accomplish you goals. Take action now and see how we can help you achieve the life you deserve.